Sometimes my pain is all consuming and other times it plays in the background like a bad song that won’t end. When a new issue pops up, I straddle two worlds. The first is my hour-to-hour existence. The second is my larger picture. It’s a balance between deciding what I need to do to make … Continue reading Flying with a broken wing
Most chronic illness and pain sufferers take medications. We require synthetic and natural interventions to live our lives. Certain meds make things significantly better, others keep us at maintenance levels, and some have the very heavy burden of keeping us alive. Because of this dependency, our relationships with medical providers and pharmacists are of the … Continue reading Skimming pills
A while ago, I met a man who wanted to date a female version of himself. His complaints about potential matches usually revolved around their way of speaking, dietary choices, hobbies, opinions, romantic needs, taste in media, etc. Basically, he was dissatisfied with each person because they had a personality of their own. He would … Continue reading Seeking sameness
There isn’t much I could write about the general moving experience that hasn’t already been said. Most of us will move dwellings at lease once in our lives. Everyone knows it’s a hassle. I… well it’s hard to keep count… I have moved over 30 times. I’ve moved countries, states, cities, towns, villages, houses, apartments, … Continue reading All over again
I’m not one of the lifers. My chronic conditions took over less than a decade ago. While I had experienced some symptoms earlier, my overwhelming and life-altering issues only developed in my late twenties. Of course, any amount of time with severe pain and symptoms feels like an eternity. Looking back to days of physical … Continue reading Welcome to the bumpiest road
I get one of my medications from another country. After years of trying every possible combination of drugs to ease my stomach symptoms and increase my appetite, my gastroenterologist told me about one of the most effective medications for my condition. However, it was/is banned in the United States. Desperate and willing to incur the … Continue reading It’s only your life in their hands
I’ve written about the weight of sharing one’s chronic medical conditions for people in the public eye. I’ve also touched on explaining illness in all types of relationships. How does that look? What is your responsibility to share the issues and symptoms that you face? How much and how loud do you go? Who do you … Continue reading Is it a secret?
You know the pain. The mental and emotional annihilation. When your stomach drops and your heart tightens. It happens to everyone. Multiple times. Throughout your life, that feeling will waver and heighten over and over again. It will occur in friendships, romances, with peers, in the workplace, around strangers, and every other type of setting … Continue reading Emotional destruction
I’ve lost count of the number of prescription medications that I have tried. At last count, the number was creeping into the upper 50s. Yep. From the time of my first, body-destroying migraine until today, I have tried over fifty separate pharmaceutical drugs. I’m not counting the intravenous or in-hospital abortive meds. Just the pills, … Continue reading What’s the alternative?
Two of my least favorite things to hear from doctors and non-sufferers is, “Pain is all in the head” and “Mind over matter”. There are strong truths in both statements. Modern science has proven that pain is an interpretation by the brain. It does not originate where we feel it. Science has also shown that … Continue reading The day after